Posted on by Helene Johnson

How to Navigate Major Life Changes and Build Lasting Resilience

By Guest Writer: Donna Erickson

Donna Erickson is a retired public educator. She created Fit Memory with a few friends as a way to promote wellness among senior citizens with the hopes it will help inspire others to make the most of their golden years.

New parents adjusting to sleepless nights, professionals starting a new job, caregivers facing a loved one’s decline, and people relocating after a breakup all meet the same hard truth: major life transitions can shake identity, routines, and relationships at once. The emotional challenges of change often feel confusing because excitement about new beginnings can sit right beside grief, fear, or numbness. Coping with uncertainty is heavy because the mind keeps scanning for what’s next, even when there’s nothing to solve yet. With steady support and realistic expectations, adaptation to life events can start to feel manageable.

Quick Summary: Building Resilience Through Change

  • Recognize stress responses and use simple calming techniques to steady yourself during transitions.
  • Build resilience with small daily habits that support sleep, movement, and emotional balance.
  • Strengthen support systems by reaching out to trusted people and using available community resources.
  • Practice practical coping methods by breaking changes into manageable steps and focusing on what you can control.

Understanding What’s Happening Inside You

A helpful starting point is naming the inner mechanics of change. Your stress response signals threat and shifts your body into protection mode, your emotions provide data, and your thinking patterns try to update your “map” of how life works. What matters is learning to spot these three layers so you can choose actions that fit the moment instead of forcing a one size fits all fix.

This matters because resilience is not about being tough every day. It is a process, and adapting well in the face of adversity often looks like making small, timely adjustments. When you can regulate feelings and update your assumptions, you recover faster and make clearer decisions.

Imagine you get laid off and your chest tightens, your mind spirals, and you snap at someone you love. That is your stress response, your emotional system, and your thinking loop all firing at once. Knowing that emotional regulation is a skill helps you pause, label what you feel, and pick the next right step. With that clarity, you can channel disruption into action and build a simple business plan without getting stuck.

Turn a Career Setback Into a Business: Your First Legal Steps

When a career hit leaves you stressed and uncertain, taking one clear action can turn that energy into forward motion. A setback can also be a pivot point: launching your own business lets you rebuild on your terms. Forming an LLC can offer helpful benefits, including personal liability protection and a structure that can feel more stable as you grow. If you’re considering the best way to start an LLC, focus on a few first legal steps: name your LLC, choose a registered agent, create an operating agreement, and apply for an EIN. Each step turns a big, emotional transition into something concrete you can complete.

Build Your Transition Playbook: Checklists for 5 Common Changes

Big changes feel lighter when you don’t rely on memory. Use the mini checklists below to turn stress into next steps, then adjust as you learn what you actually need.

  1. Moving: run a “two-week, one-week, 72-hour” checklist: Two weeks out, change your address, collect medical/school records, and start a “first-night” box with meds, chargers, toiletries, and basic cookware. One week out, use the moving-company call as your anchor task, Confirm the final details so pickup/drop-off dates, building rules, and contacts are locked in. In the last 72 hours, take photos of valuables and your old place, separate essentials from packed items, and set a 20-minute daily “don’t pack this” sweep to prevent accidental losses.
  2. Illness management: build a 3-part care map (symptoms, meds, support): Create one page that tracks your baseline symptoms, red flags that mean “call today,” and what helps on your best and hardest days. Add a meds list with dose/time, prescribing clinician, and refill date; keep it in your wallet and stick to your fridge so you’re not reconstructing details when you’re tired. Finally, list 3–5 “helpers” with specific jobs (rides, meals, childcare, pharmacy pickup) so people can say yes to a clear ask.
  3. Grief: set up a support system that works when you can’t talk: Choose two check-in people and agree on a simple signal like “1–5” by text, where 1 means “just sit with me” and 5 means “I can do errands.” Make a short “rough day plan” with three options: a low-effort comfort routine, one place you can go, and one person you can contact, then put it where you’ll see it. If decisions feel impossible, let a trusted person hold your calendar for two weeks and screen commitments.
  4. Parenting adjustments: protect connection with two daily micro-habits: Pick one five-minute “arrival ritual” (snack + chat, quick walk, or a bedtime recap) and do it even when the day went sideways, consistency is calming. During conversations, practice the small reset of put down your cell phone so your child gets full attention and you catch what they’re really asking. Once a week, hold a 10-minute family huddle: one win, one worry, one plan for the week ahead.
  5. DIY vs assisted LLC formation: compare on risk, time, and total cost (not just filing fees): Make a simple table with three columns, DIY, assisted, and “ask an expert”, then score each 1–5 for confidence, time you’ll spend, and consequences of mistakes. Add hidden-cost checks: annual reports, registered agent fees, business licenses, tax setup, and the time cost of redoing paperwork. If stress is high, choose the option that reduces decision load while keeping you in control of key choices.

Life Change Resilience: Questions People Ask Most

Q: How do I make big decisions when I’m stressed and overwhelmed?
A: Shrink the decision to the next 24 to 72 hours and choose one “good-enough” move. Write two columns: what you can control this week and what can wait. If you still feel stuck, ask a trusted person to help you name your top two priorities, not ten.

Q: What should I do when I hit a setback and feel like I’m back at square one?
A: Treat setbacks as data, not failure. Identify what changed, pick one small adjustment, and restart with a lighter goal for three days. Consistency beats intensity when your nervous system is tired.

Q: How can I find emotional support if I don’t want to burden friends or family?
A: A gathering of people facing similar challenges can feel easier than leaning on one person. Try one meeting or online group and give yourself permission to just listen at first. You can also ask a friend for a specific, time-limited favor like a 10-minute check-in.

Q: When should I consider professional help during a major transition?
A: Consider it when sleep, appetite, focus, or safety starts slipping for more than two weeks, or if you are using alcohol or scrolling to numb out. After physical trauma, depression anxiety PTSD symptoms can be common, so getting support is a practical step, not an overreaction. If you are in immediate danger, contact emergency services.

Q: Can I build resilience if I’m already exhausted?
A: Yes, but think “micro-actions,” not makeovers. Choose one recovery anchor each day: hydration, a short walk, a shower, or one nutritious meal. Protecting your baseline energy makes every other coping skill easier.

Build Resilience Through Small Steps in Confident Life Transitions

Major life changes can leave even steady people feeling untethered, especially when answers aren’t clear and emotions run high. The path forward is a mindset of empowerment through change, meeting what’s here with self-compassion, steady support, and ongoing adaptation rather than forcing certainty. Over time, those small choices create more confident life transitions, clearer boundaries, and a growing belief in what’s possible. Resilience is built in tiny moves, repeated with care. Choose one small step today, write down what’s within your control, name one support to reach for, or set a gentle next decision, and let it be enough for now. That’s how building resilience becomes personal growth that strengthens health, connection, and stability for whatever comes next.

Posted on by Helene Johnson

Book Review: The Success Myth

Book: The Success Myth, Letting Go of Having It All

Author: Emma Gannon, speaker, bestseller author, and podcaster

Key message of the book: “The Success Myths” encourages readers to examine what is our modern world’s usual idea of success – more achievement, money, status, productivity and fame – and to embrace instead a success definition that is personal and shaped by a person’s unique values, relationships and a lifestyle that represents who that person is in an authentic fashion, free of any conditioning from society or social media.

The book is born from the author’s personal story of burnout and overworking.

Each chapter debunks a success myth with anecdotes from the author, some level of criticism and insights from other authors and researchers to support the author’s main point; and ends with pointy reflection questions for the readers.

The following success myths are presented in the book:

  • There is no success formula – that is universally reliable for all human beings – because there are many factors that shape a person’s success – including personal history, behavior, gifts, and sheer luck. “If someone acts as like they have the answers to what you should do with your life, be wary of them”. Emma goes on and notes “we can spend our entire lives trying to work out other people’s success formula – or we can try a new formula, our own formula – which is doing our very best with what we have and finding ways to enjoy ourselves along the way.” There are, however, qualities and behaviors, that can be consistently observed in successful people – and their mindset can be summed up as “they believe in the path they are taking”.
  • The happiness myth – a never ending and permanent state of happiness does not exist, in part due to our primitive human brain that wants to protect us by over-reacting to perceived dangers: “Many of us have the idea that one day we will crack the happiness code, that once we make it, we will reach an everlasting state of contentment.” Not running away from negative emotions and accepting them is avoiding a happiness trap that would prevent us from embracing the temporary joys in life: “If we can’t be happy right now in whatever way possible, we won’t be happy if all the things we ever wanted fall into our laps.” Forcing happiness or looking at happiness as a test that we need to pass is toxic positivity and out of touch with the reality of the wide range of human emotions.
  • The productivity myth – working hard is a virtue unless when it leads to burnout, excessive stress or nervous breakdown: “Rest feels like an act of rebellion in a world that doesn’t want us to stop.”; “For a lot of us, we were praised as young children for how much we worked, and our hard work was seen as the value we brought to the world, so as adults we build a codependent relationship with productivity. The challenge now is to see our inherent value outside of what we produce in a capitalist world that wants to take, take, take.” To escape this myth, Emma is recommending developing rest as a skill and considering process goals in addition to milestone goals. For instance, “running a marathon” is a milestone goal, but “enjoying training for a marathon” is a process goal. “As a society, we need to embrace the art of rest, and as individuals we can start to set better boundaries and see our value outside of our output. Only then can we truly enjoy the process of achieving our goals.”
  • The “You are not your job myth” – a job is something you do that shouldn’t define your identify, purpose or worth. “Untangling ourselves from our work selves is quite the task, because work makes up such a large, and important, proportion of our lives.” – “When we wrap ourselves up so tightly in our work, we are in danger of losing important parts of ourselves” and neglecting important people or aspects of life like health and family. Creating more boundaries between work and home preserves a sense of self and balance that is conducive to feeling fulfilled.
  • The celebrity myth – a celebrity status is not a reliable model for success with so many examples of celebrities feeling lonely and unhappy. “Status brings validation, and it’s natural that we’re all seeking that. We want to be seen, understood and recognized.” However, internal validation and being appreciated by the people in your life are a lot more important for a fulfilled life: “We don’t need to chase outward markers of success or status in a big way to feel seen, as there are so many other ways to feel authentically appreciated and validated. The first step is seeing ourselves. Not through a lens, not through the eyes of thousands of followers, but really, truly seeing ourselves for who we are, and understanding what matters to us. Validating ourselves first is an important but overlooked part of building an authentic sense of status. When we crave the approval of others, really, we are craving our own approval.” ” The key is building recognition on your own terms, having good boundaries and feeling appreciated by the people in your life, not strangers on the other side of a screen.”
  • The money myth – money helps with security and solving problems, but chasing money for the sake of financial success does not guarantee security, fulfillment or a better life. “Your time is also a currency. Your energy is a currency. Your mental wellbeing is a currency.”
  • The ambition myth – ambition is not a problem, until we push ourselves beyond the limits of our bodies and ignore our true needs, which can lead to burnout and self‑abandonment. “We can have big dreams, but we don’t need to burn ourselves out to get there.” We can be “ambitious for a better life. Ambitions for a healthier life. Ambitious on our own terms.”
  • The checkbox myth – ticking the box of certain traditional life milestones – like getting married, buying a house, having kids, or having a certain income – is not a guarantee for a fulfilled life. As per the author, there is no single path to adulthood or success, and we should attain any life milestone without the pressures of society, families or peer comparison.

  • The arrival myth – success is not a finish line we arrive to. “There is an assumption that once we reach a big life or career goal, we will finally be version 2.0 and we will stay there. You will feel different, better. Then the disappointment sets in. We realize the fictional ‘destination’ doesn’t exist.” The author is discouraging from banking happiness on a “future” state or goal – “A lot of enjoying life in the moment is about patience, and the ability to be OK with where we are right now.”

In summary, “The Success Myth” is about being OK with not having it all and responding to a critical question with honesty: “How much is your current version of success costing you? If it’s costing you too much, what, if anything, are you prepared to give up?” The answer does not mean giving up to everything or to, too much, it’s finding your own equation for success: “Enjoy the ride, enjoy your success, whatever that means for you.”

Posted on by Helene Johnson

Book Review: Essentialism

Book: Essentialism, The Disciplined Pursuit of Less

Author: Greg McKeown, speaker, bestseller author, and podcaster

Key message of the book: Essentialism is a practical and insightful guide about a lifestyle and mindset, defined by making the wisest choices – at all times – in terms of how we spend our limited time and energy:

“The life of an Essentialist is a life lived without regret. If you have correctly identified what really matters, if you invest your time and energy in it, then it is difficult to regret the choices you make. You become proud of the life you have chosen to live.”

As per the author, the essentialism is not about getting more things done nor about doing less for the sake of doing less – it is about operating “at our highest point of contribution by doing only what is essential”.

The core mindset of an essentialist is doing “the right thing the right way at the right time”.

The core truths of an essentialist are: “I choose to”, “Only a few things matter“, and “I can do anything but not everything”.

Essentialists understand that:

  • We all have the ability to choose, and we need to heighten our awareness to such ability. When we forget this core truth – our ability to choose- “drip by drip we allow our power to be taken away until we end up becoming a function of other people’s choices – or even a function of our own past choices.”
  • There are always trade-offs to make: “As painful as they can sometimes be, trade-offs represent a significant opportunity. By forcing us to weigh both options and strategically select the best one for us, we significantly increase our chance of achieving the outcome we want.”
  • We can live a life by design vs by default – by distinguishing “the vital few from the trivial many”, and by removing “obstacles so the essential things have clear, smooth passage.” The result of such discipline – of saying no to some choices, of choosing wisely, of eliminating nonessentials – is living “a life true to yourself, not the life others expect from you“: “Everything changes when we give ourselves permission to be more selective in what we choose to do.”
  • We need to create space to think, explore, and recharge. Sleep, for instance, is a necessity and a priority to achieve the highest levels of mental contribution.
  • We need to be ultra selective: “If it isn’t a clear yes, then it’s a clear no”. An essentialist applies tougher criteria for decision making. For instance, the “90 percent rule” means applying the single most important criterion for a decision and give each option a score between 0 and 100. Any option rated lower than 90% gets eliminated.
  • We need to be intentional about our choices and such clarity brings breakthroughs and focus on the right things and people in our lives: “Creating an essential intent is hard. It takes courage, insight, and foresight to see which activities and efforts will add up to our simple point of contribution. It takes asking tough questions, making real trade-offs, and exercising serious discipline to cut out the competing priorities that distract us from our true intention. Yet it is worth the effort because only with real clarity of purpose can people, teams and organizations fully mobilize and achieve something truly excellent.“
  • We need to learn to say no and set boundaries as often as necessary. Saying no is hard because it’s engrained in our human wiring to depend on others – when our survival was tied to belonging to a tribe, hunting together for food: “Nonessentialists say yes because of feelings of social awkwardness and pressure. They say yes automatically, without thinking often in pursuit of the rush one gets from having pleased someone. But Essentialists know that after the rush comes the pang of regret. They know they will soon feel bullied and resentful -both at the other person and at themselves. Eventually they will wake up to the unpleasant reality that something more important must now be sacrificed to accommodate this new commitment.“

In summary, eliminating, condensing, limiting, cutting, reducing are ways of Essentialists. When these things happen, Essentialists have time and energy to perfect execution for what is very important in their lives. They do that by practicing extreme and early preparation, starting small and building momentum towards their goals, staying focused on making progress, and celebrating acts of progress – all in what becomes a regular routine -perfected with practice – for long term success: “The Essentialist designs a routine that makes achieving what you have identified as essential the default position. Yes, in some instances an Essentialist still has to work hard, but with the right routine in place each effort yields exponentially greater results.”

Essentialists fundamentally understand two powerful truths:

(1) “of all forms of human motivation the most effective one is progress”

(2) there is only now, meaning being tuned in and doing what is important – right now, not in the past and not in the future.

Over time, with practicing making the wisest possible choices of time and energy, essentialism becomes a way of life that brings meaning and purpose.

Posted on by Helene Johnson

Disconnection is not an end but a beginning

Pressures in life can be insidious and, from time to time, the pressure cooker gets unbearable. We admit to these pressures often after the water has boiled over, and we understand that the disconnection was a natural consequence of absorbing spoken or unspoken and acknowledged or yet-to-be-acknowledged pressures.

The story of our modern and highly interconnected lives is pressure… to fit in, to be successful by societal standards, to be and do it all … while pressure for our early hominins was getting chased by lions in the savannah. These modern life pressures can come from the most well intended people around us, from ourselves or from standards that, at times, we set too high. They could also come from people who, at the end, are consciously or unconsciously not well intended, with whom we have yet to set proper boundaries.

lf you are at one of these crossroads – where disconnection is what you feel in the moment or have been feeling for a while, the sooner you befriend it, the sooner you can come to grasp with it and use it for your growth. This is an opportune moment to start afresh, more self-aware of what it takes to keep a healthy and happy self – you!

A practical guide to transform a “disconnection” crisis follows below with 5 critical steps:

  1. Pause and Journal: You can’t outrun disconnection. The longer you live with it, the higher the risk that it turns into something more severe, for instance burnout or physical ailments. Even a few days of feeling disconnected warrants a pause. You deserve it. Then jot down what weighs heavy in your mind or body – in full or partial sentences, or simply words – connected to the pressures that might have burdened you lately. You know you are getting to the end of your list when your journaling starts being about what you are grateful for and what your heart yearns the most, including feeling appreciated and loved, which are fundamental needs that motivate our behaviors.
  2. Evaluate these pressure points with your morality and values compass: Once these pressures points are exposed on a piece of paper, it is easier to acknowledge and analyze them. What is real versus perception? What comes from your judgment or the judgement of others? Which ones should you give weight to? Which ones deserve an honest conversation with yourself or someone in your life? Which ones would you want or need to carry forward? Which ones should you leave behind as not aligned with your true values, needs or aspirations?
  3. Rest: Physical rest, be it longer sleep or naps, and taking time for yourself are oxygen to human life. It is when rest lacks that pressures accumulate until everything snowballs into disconnection, burnout, disease or depression. No matter how temporary your state of disconnect has been, give yourself a good few days of rest.
  4. Commit to a fresh start with at least one identified change: With a rested mind and body, and more self-awareness, you can finally see through what has been weighing you down and what adjustments you need to make – big or small- to free yourself from undue pressures. Think in terms of what you need to do to cut the source of pressure points that don’t deserve your focus and energy. As to due pressures, even if there is no immediate action you can identify as needed to be taken, the simple fact of having cleared your mind, will position you to embrace what the day brings and your responsibilities with more clarity and energy.
  5. Remember you are your biggest asset: The danger of disconnection is feeling like a stranger in your own life, and that can remove agency and alter your choices and with them, your future over time. Health can also take a toll from prolonged disconnection. That is the opposite of what we owe to ourselves: self-compassion, self-connection and self-care. When we are our biggest supporters, we can also be better supporters of people around us.

Author Kamal Ravikant noted:

“Pain doesn’t last. And when it’s gone, we have something to show for it: growth.”

Likewise, disconnection doesn’t last … if we let it speak to us and shape the adjustments we need to make in our lives.

Posted on by Helene Johnson

Book Review: Wild Courage

Book: Wild Courage, Go After What You Want And Get It

Author: Jenny Wood, a former successful executive at Google, and a speaker and writer on leadership development

Key message of the book: “Wild Courage” is an easy-to-read book, written with a clear purpose to fuel your personal and professional growth ambitions. With a lot of anecdotes and funny stories from her own life and career, the author is reframing nine negatively labeled traits into skills to develop to achieve success.

Each of these nine traits is defined by the author with the word “courage”:

  • Weird is “the courage to stand out”.
  • Selfish is “the courage to stand up for what you want”.
  • Shameless is “the courage to stand behind your efforts and abilities”.
  • Obsessed is “the courage to set your own standard”.
  • Nosy is “the courage to dig deeper”.
  • Manipulative is “the courage to influence others”.
  • Brutal is “the courage to protect your time and energy”.
  • Reckless is “the courage to take calculated risks”.
  • Bossy is “the courage to listen and lead”.

Courage is presented as key to success: “Successful people take action despite their fear. They muster the courage to do what’s necessary to succeed before it’s encouraged by others -or even considered socially acceptable.”

Each trait is defined in a new perspective, a constructive and positive one, in a way that makes it clear why such trait is necessary to get what we want in life.

  • Weird is owning your greatest strengths and being authentic about them “instead of second-guessing yourself out of desperation to fit in.”
    • “It’s about being yourself and revealing that self appropriately, both in your resume and everywhere else.”
    • “Figuring out who you are – how you think and solve problems, what you enjoy and dislike, the values that matter most -is essential in (a) deciding what to chase in life and (b) actually catching in.”
  • Selfish is the courage to “champion your agenda at least as strongly as you champion the needs of others.”
    • “Fighting for yourself just as enthusiastically as you fight for your friends and colleagues.”
  • Shameless is “no more apologizing for who you are and what you can do”. While shame is “a normal and healthy reaction”, “applying shame’s energy to finding a solution brings relief. Taking action tells your brain that you’re solving the problem. It’s the lingering shame that has to go.”
    • “Shame doesn’t care what you’re saying or asking. It just wants you quiet, inoffensive, invisible -“safe”. Opening that big mouth habitually builds that shameless muscle.”
  • Obsessed is having the inner drive to excel. “When you’re obsessed, you find the discipline to get out of your own way” and adopt a growth mindset where everything can be learned: “I’m not the leader I need to be yet”, while taking care of your physical and mental health and having proper boundaries.
    • “Obsession derives from two convictions: (1) that what you want matters and (2) that you can achieve what you want with sufficient effort.”
    • “You will never grow and evolve without pushing yourself to do the hard, careful and deliberate work that tests the limits of your capabilities.”
  • Nosy is letting curiosity be a compass, without being too aggressive, obnoxious or disrespectful in interactions with others.
    • “Ask [questions] politely, prioritize the mutual win and act on what you learn”.
    • “Answer questions with the same degree of vulnerability, authenticity and candor you expect from others.”
  • Manipulative is not about using others but “being influential, inspiring, motivating and persuasive” by adding positive energy in any room – in a truthful and authentic way.
    • “Warmth isn’t being complicated. It can be as simple as framing a neutral message in a more positive way.”
  • Brutal is being “direct, clear and consistent with your words and actions.”
    • “To achieve your goals, you must commit to spending your time and energy in accordance with your true priorities, no matter how painful it sometimes feels.”
    • “Brutal frees up time, energy and mental bandwidth”.
  • Reckless is to “err on the side of action”.
    • “You can seek perfection or progress. Not both. And, unlike perfection, progress is possible.”
    • “To the fragile ego, any failure is unacceptable. Successful people fail far more than most people do.”
  • Bossy is about being a “genuine boss: an empathic, supportive, yet decisive leader who knows when to speak up and when to listen, when to let the team figure a problem out themselves, and when to step in with help and a fresh perspective.”
    • “Use your power responsibly”.

This book review by Growth Is A Journey is an invitation for readers to discover the book in its entirety.

Posted on by Helene Johnson

Resolutions vs Commitment

At the beginning of every year, there is a lot of talk about New Year’s Resolutions. Many of them become already obsolete or failed attempts by the end of January.

I’m a big fan of New Year’s resolutions, goals and vision boards. I started doing some of these practices with my kids as well to get them to think of life achievements in many ways, including in terms of setting and reaching specific goals.

New Year’s and birthdays are a great time to set new resolutions and goals because we benefit from the “fresh start effect”, a psychological boost that helps us build momentum for creating change and new habits. But one of the most critical considerations for successful resolutions is commitment.

How committed are we to our goals?

As a kid, every time my mom asked me to do something, she always reminded me to first get committed to doing it well. I wondered at times if she had some magic power to know when I was not committed 100% because she knew it. Once, she told me to stop doing something I was doing to help in the house and go back and play. I felt the sting of disappointing my mom but above all, I got the lesson that shaped my strong work and learning ethic. A job well done is one that starts with the commitment of doing a good job. Not a perfect job … but one to which best effort is put forward.

Returning to the concept of New Year’s resolutions, to which goal or goals are we really committed to?

… To put the best effort forward even when no one watches.

… To take matters into our own hands and design a strategy with the resources and ideas we have today. No perfection required, just a genuine start.

… To do the hard work even when the easy work could be tempting.

… To be consistent with habits, behavior or action that are required to reach our goal.

… To start again tomorrow even if we feel we might have failed today.

… To take ownership of the momentum created over time with consistency and efforts, and adjust as necessary to reach the end goal.

Sometimes, our commitment is driven by pressure, social comparison or fears. But this type of commitment is weak and cannot endure. Pursuing goals from such commitment usually leads to stress, burnout or lack of fulfillment.

Real commitment comes when we set resolutions from our most honest and sturdiest self. If clarity lacks, there are a few questions that can help. For instance:

  • If there is one goal or change that if achieved by the end of the year would make you truly happy – what would that be?
  • How would you like this year or chapter of life to be remembered and how can you get there?
  • Start with the end in mind – at the end of your life, what would you like people to say about you?

The question is not what New Year’s Resolutions we have set.

The real question is what are we willing to commit to and why?

As a practical application of this reflection, think about any goal you have set or are considering setting for this year, and go through the above questions to test your commitment to it. This can be done for both personal and professional goals. Only when we are ready to truly commit to what it entails to reach a goal – meaning understanding our what, why and how – we can position ourselves for successfully reaching it. And most of the time, the real success is not in reaching a specific goal, it is in the growth achieved in the process. 

As James Hollis describes in his book, “Living an Examined Life”:

“Our life begins twice: the day we are born and the day we accept the radical existential fact that our life, for all its delimiting factors, is essentially ours to choose. And the moment when we open to that invitation and step into that accountability, we take on the power of choice.”

Posted on by Helene Johnson

Book Review: The Path To Positivity

Book: The Path To Positivity, Proven Positive Thinking Techniques for Getting Motivated and Living Your Best Life

Author: Caitlin Margaret

Key message of the book: The Path To Positivity is a practical, well-researched and insightful guide for developing a positive mindset, with all its benefits such as better mental and physical health, and more successful life outcomes. As per the author, positivity is not forcing a smile at all times. True positivity is the result of consistent practices such as challenging our negative thought patterns, cultivating mindfulness and gratitude, and embracing imperfection, self-care and self-compassion. Caitlin further posits that positivity is not developed overnight or to perfection; it is a continuous journey that reminds us of our imperfections and humanity – “Every deep breath, every consciously created thought, every choice you make to try again after failure, every positive emotion you share with another person is evidence that you are capable of creating a positive life“.

One favorite quote from the book: 

“You find positivity not by achieving every desire you’ve ever had or optimizing every moment of your life, but by realizing who you are on the deepest level: a Wise Mind, rooted in important values, learning and growing from every experience, cultivating the thoughts, emotions, and behaviors that support you along the way.”

This brief book review by Growth Is A Journey is an invitation for readers to discover the book in its entirety.

Posted on by Helene Johnson

Happy New Year 2026!

We have more wisdom than we think and more strength than we believe.

We have more wisdom than we think and more strength than we believe.

We have more wisdom than we think and more strength than we believe.

… Because at times we need to say words out loud or repeat the same mistake multiple times for the wisdom of our own souls to be heard. Sometimes this wisdom is heard in little whispers, other times, in a big loud voice which we can no longer ignore, or we will break.

At the end of 2025, the wisdom that each one of us carries within by design is invaluable. So, if you lived in this truth, how a new year of life would look like for you? What intentions will you bring in the new year? What will you do more of, or less of? Who will you be spending more time with? What habits will become non-negotiable for you? What experiences and dreams will you pursue? Who will be your tribe and whose tribe will you be a part of?

Living in the wisdom of our souls is not forced positivity, or lack of honesty vis-a-vis ourselves or others on behavior or habits to stop or develop, or the wisdom to acquire. lt is accountable and empowered living with compassion and rest when we need it and with clarity and alignment with who we are or want to be.

What are your heart’s biggest hopes and dreams? Name and claim them – with perseverance, consistency, gratefulness and appreciation of having the opportunity to pursue them, no matter what the starting point might be, and what beginnings or endings might be required.

May 2026 be lived in wisdom and strength, in peace and love, and in accountability and inspiration of what life has to offer.

May 2026 be the year with more opportunities and blessings that we can ever imagine at the beginning of this year.

May 2026 be a year of radiant and wise living.

PS: If you are still pondering what New Year’s practices you could experiment with this year, two activities I highly recommend are: (1) choose a word for the year, leaning into your own inner wisdom about the most important intention, reflected in such choice of word for the coming year and (2) build a personal wall calendar with pictures from every month of the previous year as a way to reflect upon the year that passed and to prolong savoring its greatest memories, one month at a time.

Posted on by Helene Johnson

The Art of the Sustainable Hustle: How to Chase Your Dreams Without Losing Your Sanity

By Guest Writer: Donna Erickson

Donna Erickson is a retired public educator. She created Fit Memory with a few friends as a way to promote wellness among senior citizens with the hopes it will help inspire others to make the most of their golden years.

Starting a side hustle can feel like sprinting a marathon — exhilarating at first but exhausting if you don’t pace yourself wisely. Whether you’re freelancing after work, launching a passion project, or testing a startup idea, protecting your well-being isn’t optional. It’s the key to lasting progress. Sustainable growth happens when you manage your energy as carefully as your ambition — not by running yourself into the ground.

The Gist

Success in your side hustle depends on balance. Protect your energy through clear routines, realistic goals, and intentional breaks. Focus on progress, not perfection. Use structure to prevent burnout, and treat rest as part of the work.

Setting the Scene

The biggest trap for new entrepreneurs is believing “more hours = more success.” In reality, overexertion kills creativity. When fatigue becomes your default state, productivity drops — and joy disappears.

So, the real art isn’t in grinding nonstop; it’s in crafting rhythms that keep both ambition and well-being alive.

Early-Stage Balance at a Glance

AreaChallengeBalance StrategyTools or Resources
EnergyLate-night exhaustionCreate a “shutdown ritual” before sleepHeadspace, Calm
FocusConstant multitaskingUse time-blocking for one task at a timeTodoist, Notion
MoneyUnclear financesSeparate business & personal budgets earlyMint, YNAB
LearningInformation overloadFollow one learning path per quarterSkillshare, Coursera
Mental healthBurnout signsSchedule real downtime like appointmentsBetterHelp, Insight Timer

Self-Care Foundations for Hustlers

✅ Identify your “core hours” — when you do your best work
✅ Take one day per week entirely off digital devices
✅ Keep a gratitude log (it rewires burnout-prone thinking)
✅ Exercise or walk daily, even for 15 minutes
✅ Practice saying “no” to low-impact tasks
✅ Revisit your “why” monthly to stay aligned

How-To: Create a Sustainable Side-Hustle System

  1. Start with the End in Mind — Define what success looks like without overwork.

  2. Design Your Week, Don’t Drift Into It — Use a template Sunday evening to allocate time for work, rest, and creation.

  3. Batch Energy-Intensive Tasks — Protect mornings for deep work and use low-energy hours for admin.

  4. Automate the Mundane — Use simple automations (like calendar scheduling or expense tracking) to reclaim mental bandwidth.

  5. Reflect Weekly — Ask: Did I honor my energy this week? If not, adjust, don’t guilt-spiral.

Getting Support Without Losing Focus

Sometimes, the best self-care is not doing everything alone. Delegating, automating, or partnering can protect your energy and help you grow faster.

If your side hustle starts taking off, consider using a comprehensive support platform like ZenBusiness. It helps entrepreneurs run and scale efficiently — from forming an LLC to managing compliance, websites, and finances — so you can stay focused on your craft instead of admin overwhelm.

FAQ

Q: How do I balance a full-time job and a side hustle without burning out?
A: Cap your hustle hours and protect rest days like meetings. Burnout starts where boundaries end.

Q: What if I feel guilty taking breaks?
A: Reframe rest as productivity insurance — not indulgence. Without recovery, quality work isn’t possible.

Q: How do I stay motivated when progress feels slow?
A: Track micro-wins weekly. Momentum builds from visible evidence, not abstract goals.

Product Spotlight — Focusmate

If procrastination is your nemesis, try Focusmate. It pairs you with a real person online for body-double work sessions. Many side hustlers use it to stay accountable and beat isolation during long evenings of solo work.

Glossary

Core hours — The time of day when you’re naturally most focused and creative.
Burnout — Emotional and physical exhaustion from chronic stress or overwork.
Time-blocking — Scheduling specific blocks for single tasks to reduce context-switching.
Side hustle — Any project generating income outside a primary job.
Self-care — Practices that protect your mental, emotional, and physical health.

Your side hustle is a marathon with scenic detours, not a sprint to exhaustion. Protect your energy early — routines, boundaries, and the right tools will carry you farther than pure willpower ever could. Sustainable success comes from balance, not burnout. Treat rest as a strategy, not a reward, and you’ll build momentum that lasts beyond the hustle.

Posted on by Helene Johnson

The Gift of Self- Reflection – Emotions

Decades and centuries of technological innovation, prospering societies and industrial advancements have conditioned us to keep moving ahead as human beings, from childhoods to retirements, with predictable and desirable life milestones. In this conditioning, we are easily in touch with our physical ailments and needs. We know to stop when our heads or stomachs are hurting, and we can interrupt our daily routines to attempt to take care of the pesty ailment. But over this long-term conditioning, we often overlook to stay attuned to our own emotions and deepest desires of our souls.

We might have buried or suppressed emotions, in particular the negative ones, so deeply that it might take months, years or decades to tend to them. But it comes a time in life when the doing is no longer enough to keep us “put together”. Even the highest contributors might be slowing down. Even the most caring person can no longer care. Our mental or physical health might be taking a toll; our relationships might be suffering; our bodies might be breaking.

We understand we can no longer live life like before and do things like before. The pressure cooker was on within our bodies and souls. And the cooker is on – all the time – not because of some childhood or adulthood tragedies, although these are often cause of major trauma in someone’s life.

What we might be fundamentally missing is that we are human beings designed to live life in touch with our emotions. Our oldest brain is the emotions (limbic) brain. Our thinking (neocortex) brain is an add-on in our homo sapiens evolution. Emotions have always come first, and they can be our highest source of intelligence and human progress. If we neglect or deny this body, soul and mind connection, we might end up missing a big part of our potential for a fulfilled life.

In the simplest of terms, emotions are portals for growth. Behind emotions that challenge us – usually our triggers – therein lies the more evolved versions of ourselves. And this is a gift in itself, a coin with two sides. Once we develop the skills to detect, feel and understand negative emotions, we also perfect the skills to feel, embody and emanate positive emotions like profound joy, love, and gratefulness.

This self-awareness to the gravity of our emotions can often appear as a breaking point, especially if emotions are negative or have been suppressed or repressed for a long time, but it is, in fact, a turn-around point. Although it might seem like we could be breaking in many pieces, we are not. We are re-creating ourselves, putting ourselves together, but this time, with all the parts that make us whole finally … It’s a rebirth from a place of authenticity, self-love and freedom. By allowing us to feel and make space for the hardest and possibly ugliest of our emotions, we start making space for what we desire and need underneath layers of surface emotions and for what we might have been looking for but possibly in the wrong ways and places – to feel loved, appreciated and safe.

There is no better way to live in fact than when we are attuned to our emotions. And that starts with embodying and understanding them one at a time. And in this self-awareness journey, truthful to who we once were and who we have become – with scars and trophies of our past experiences, but also truthful to our deepest desires, there are two important pieces to remember – vulnerability and nourishment.

  • Vulnerability is being honest with ourselves and with others including about boundaries we need to create or have in place.
  • Nourishment is feeding our bodies, souls and minds in ways that help us stay in the energy of the present moment and of the love within and outside us.

Transformation comes from within. Embracing and understanding our emotions offers a pathway to a life that is fuller, built on love and vulnerability but also on boundaries and expression of our truest desires and needs.

For a practical way to apply these concepts, the “Pathway” book by Laurel Mellin is a wonderful resource. It talks about the concept of emotional balance and getting ourselves above vs below the (emotional) line, by building the skills of feeling our emotions and of setting boundaries including self-boundaries that might not exist when we use external solutions (e.g. addictions) to soothe ourselves. Behind feelings of anger, sadness, or guilt, there might be, in fact, an unreasonable expectation that we hold. Once we name what might be unreasonable in the story we told ourselves, we are able to identify a more reasonable expectation and overcome an existential pain that we might need to face for these negative emotions to no longer have the same hold on us: e.g. moving from “my parents always neglected me” to “my parents were busy with my youngest sibling and couldn’t reasonably give me all their attention”. The book talks about everyone journeying towards his or her “internal” solution which is found when we live in alignment with our most authentic desire in life: e.g. intimacy, joy – by moving ourselves from below to above the line every single time negative emotions take the better of us.

Posted on by Helene Johnson

The Gift of Self Reflection – Our Identities

Paradise Island, Bahamas

During a Mother’s Day weekend, as many working moms juggling family and work, I cannot stop thinking how I wouldn’t be the mom I am today without the professional journey I have experienced for the last two decades, and I wouldn’t be the professional I am today without what the journey of being a mom has taught me so far. This is because at the end of each day, we are more than being a parent, a professional, a wife, a daughter, or a friend; and we are more than any accomplishments or mistakes we could count in our lives. What defines and shapes us is:

  • To live in alignment with who we truly are or who we have the potential to become.
  • To not let us be defined by a single experience of life, a single identity, a single role, specific success or failure.
  • To be intentional about the environment and relationships we want to cultivate around us.
  • To be intentional about protecting our energy and setting boundaries.
  • To see the opportunity afforded by each moment to grow and evolve.
  • To live inspired by others as the window to what is possible to create in our lives.
  • To find the joy in the moment, one life milestone and chapter at a time.

These are principles that a mom would so dearly want to pass on to her kids.

When we live by these principles, we live awaken, transformed, and empowered. We build our stories of life as the unique sum product of all our roles and life experiences.

“To the world you may be one person; but to one person you may be the world.” — Dr. Seuss

“All that I am, or hope to be, I owe to my angel mother.” — Abraham Lincoln

“Motherhood is a choice you make everyday, to put someone else’s happiness and well-being ahead of your own, to teach the hard lessons, to do the right thing even when you’re not sure what the right thing is…and to forgive yourself, over and over again, for doing everything wrong.” ― Donna Ball, At Home on Ladybug Farm.

Enjoy the gift of self-reflection and be transformed by it!

Posted on by Helene Johnson · 1 Comment

Book Review: Helping People Win at Work

Book: Helping People Win at Work, A Business Philosophy Called “Don’t Mark My Paper, Help Me Get An A”

Author: Ken Blanchard and Garry Ridge

Key message of the book: Performance review systems can be burdensome, and managers are often compelled to assess employees on a normal distribution bell-shaped curve – with poor, good and high-performance levels. The book describes a different approach to performance review, one that stands out as effective, transparent and a catalyst for high performance for ALL employees.

The proposed framework is rooted in a business philosophy called “Don’t Mark My Paper, Help Me Get An A“. The approach is compared to a teacher who, instead of grading his/her students at the end of the course, he/she supports students by sharing the final exam at the beginning of the course, then supports their learning with the aim that all students get an A, with teaching, coaching and ongoing assessment throughout the semester. For leaders in an organization, this philosophy for performance review translates into:

  • Managers sitting down with their employees to set expectations and goals at the beginning of each year
  • Consistent coaching, feedback and re-direction in day-to-day and weekly interactions and execution plans – while affirming or re-affirming the employee’s potential to get an A
  • Regular (quarterly if possible) reviews to assess gaps, confirm progress and goals and values alignment

In this system, an employee’s performance level is the direct responsibility of his/her manager – and manager is bound to provide regular feedback – “with candor and care” – to help his/her employee get an A at the final performance evaluation. This approach puts more responsibility on the manager helping his/her employees and making sure feedback and support are provided first, before concluding if an employee is ready to be shared with competition as he/she cannot get an A: “If our culture of candor, caring, accountability and responsibility doesn’t work for you, let’s share you with the competitor.“

This framework enhances what true leadership is as the book authors highlight: “At its best, leadership is a partnership – one that involves mutual trust and respect between two people who work together to achieve common goals. When that occurs, both leader and direct report have an opportunity to influence each other. Both parties play a role in determining how things get done. In other words, it’s all about we, not me.”

The book overall reinforces what many high performing leaders and managers do and believe: a successful performance review system is one that incorporates clear communication of and alignment in goals, values and expectations from the beginning (Q1 of a year for instance) and is followed with regular feedback and touchpoints throughout the year for an employee to successfully meet his/her performance goals.

One specific learning from the book:  “Candor and caring” are needed for feedback to be effective. Caring is defined as “behavior that demonstrates your concern about the person’s development, professionally and personally” while candor is about being honest with a person about his/her performance. “With caring, you get to make deposits in your emotional bank account with a person“, while negative feedback always hurts, acting as a withdrawal in the emotional bank account with that person. The authors point to how such pain is short lived and turns into a “Learning moment” if the emotional bank account is balanced.

One favorite quote from the book: 

“The key to developing people is to catch them doing something right.”

Bonus resource: Another book review of the book

This brief book review by Growth Is A Journey is an invitation for readers to discover the book in its entirety.